You won’t believe the rumors that I’m hearing about some church over in Poway. One of the elders – the CFO of a high-tech company, no less – is suffering from a terrible temptation. A beautiful young woman moved into his house. She says that she’s his sex slave, and he’s her owner. That’s right! The harlot says that she’ll give him any kind of sex that he wants just for the asking. He can tie her up; he can beat her; whatever he wants. She’ll even have sex with other men if he tells her to. And it’s not just men, she’ll service homosexual women, too. His minister tried to help him resist the temptation, but she’s too much even for a man of God. There’s rumors that all the elders in the church are sinking into the pit of moral depravity. She’s a modern Whore of Babylon and the church is Sodom and Gomorrah risen again. I fear for all their souls.