WHAT DID I LEARN FROM ANSWERING 5000 LETTERS ON WOMEN'S LOVE LIVES?
‘Can you summarize the book for me in a minute?’ People have asked me that hundreds of times. So here's the 3-word summary for ya: BE THE LIGHT.
What does that mean? Well, 5000 or so letters I've received from women readers on their dating woes can all be boiled down to this: ‘Does my butt look good in these pants?’
Okay, what they're really asking is ‘Am I enough?’ Answer: Wrong question! Because that's not a game you can win! Focus on this question instead: ‘How can I make the people around me feel like a million bucks?’
How to Generate the Love You Want Instead of Waiting for It to Happen
Because at any point in life, you have the option to elevate those around you -- with a look, a touch, a phrase of praise, genuine appreciation. ‘Hey, love what you've done with that outfit.’ ‘That was a great book! Learned so much.’ ‘Thanks for the fabulous meal!’
When you appreciate and elevate others, they light up. And because we're hypersocial, empathic beings equipped with mirror neurons, YOU light up, and everyone notices: ‘Who is that glow-in-the-dark girl? I want to be around that!‘
Now, you've got a crowd gathered around you. Lonely no more! And instead of coming from a place of lack or need, you're coming from abundance, joy, and choice. A much stronger starting point for any relationship.
But most important: Butts and fashions change. The power to elevate, on the other hand, is power that cannot be taken away from you. The Tao of Dating is your manual for learning how to be the light and come into your authentic power.
What readers say:
‘The content is intelligent and compassionate and enriching far beyond anything to do with dating. In essence, this book somehow, magically, alchemically, brings you back to yourself. Everyday TV and other media specialize in portraying women as cheap and disposable. This book is the antidote. Just by reading it, one is restored to one's own heart. I can think of no better praise.’
‘I have read many books about relationships and dating, but The Tao of Dating is one of a kind, so different and mind-blowing in its common sense and simplicity that it is impossible to put it down once you start reading.’
‘Thanks to this specific book, I went from having a nonexistent dating life, with empty weeks stretching ahead, to being booked every night of the week...The results were dramatic: I now feel like I have my pick of the litter with a slew of fabulous guys who all clamor for my attention.’
Why I wrote this book: When I was an advisor at Harvard, I noticed that smart women like yourself were having unfulfilling love lives on an epidemic scale. They either couldn't find the right guy, were with the wrong guy, had relationships that didn't last, or had given up on dating entirely. I wrote this book to remedy the situation.
This is not your grandma's dating guide. Partially because I'm not your grandma, and partially because the 21st century poses unprecedented challenges to the modern woman. Is there time for love within a high-powered career? And nowadays, lots of guys are less educated and affluent than you. What to do? I give you tips on how to handle all that.
Ancient Wisdom + Modern Science = lasting love + happiness for successful women like yourself. This is a heart-centered, science-based, practical guide to finding fulfillment in your love lives and far beyond, all through a series of small, simple steps that put the fun back in dating. Join the tens of thousands of women who who have transformed their lives with The Tao of Dating.
Tao of dating
Excellent! The bible of dating!
I enjoyed this book.
It came off as a little contradicting in some cases, but the overall grasp of the book can be fulfilling. Take what works for you.
The contradicting parts for me landed when we were asked to look for the bad characteristics in a guy. I say that because there was also a point in the book that said when you focus on something you get more of it. So I would say always look for the good in all things to bring more of that. You search, you will find.
The book also mentioned that there are many good and bad qualities in a man and it that depends on what "you" bring out in him. so I would say keep your eyes on the good qualities ☺️
Changed My Outlook
When I first purchased this book I had pretty much given up on ever finding a good guy. I am still searching for "the guy", but I am now having a blast doing it. Through this book I learned a lot about myself and what I needed as opposed to what I sought. I have been able to apply a lot of what I learned from Dr. Ali. Furthermore I feel more empowered than ever before!