Thinking and Decision Making

Thinking and Decision Making is a practical guide to helping children develop the habits of clear, independent thinking.

The most valuable thing a parent can give a child is not the right answer. It is the ability to find good answers for themselves.

This book shows parents and carers how to build that ability through ordinary moments of family life. Children learn to notice what is happening, recognise patterns, separate facts from feelings, consider their options, think about consequences and make deliberate choices.

At the centre of the book are three simple questions:

What is happening right now?
What are my choices?
What happens next if I choose each one?

Rather than immediately solving problems for a child, parents learn how to ask better questions, create a pause between feeling and action, give children genuine choices and help them learn from the results.

The aim is not to tell children what to think. It is to help them become increasingly capable of thinking for themselves.

Written for parents and carers of children roughly aged 7–13, with ideas that can be adapted for younger children and teenagers.

Practical systems, not parenting theories.

B-Useful Systems: teach children how to think, not what to think.